June 25th, 2018 – Infusion 3
Today was my 3rd infusion. Typically, most patients see some sort of change by now. After today, the hope is that we will be able to determine there has been some positive change and we will continue treatment as planned. If the doctor determines the ketamine infusions don’t seem to be working, he may advise we stop treatment.
Ketamine is not FDA approved, and is not covered by insurance whatsoever. My SAINT of a mother, who continues to believe in me with such intensity and love, and who continues to fight for my health after all I’ve put her through over the years, is paying for everything herself. Let me tell you, I will be gladly in debt to my mother for the many many many times she’s given me another shot at health and happiness at great expense .
From the start, we knew this was a gamble. The next few days sort of determine how much more we put on the line – not just with money, but with hope. Bebe, the very warm and kind office manager at the Ketamine clinic talked about how false hope can be incredibly damaging. And that’s something we have been gambling with as well.
It’s super hard because they have said that I won’t notice change. In fact, they have let me know that I will be the *last* to know. So it comes down to Corey and my mom and other people in my life. Looking for something new, something shiny maybe, or some part of me that hasn’t seen the light in a long time. A warmth behind my eyes, a lightness in my spirit, a subtle hint that those changes in my brain are taking place.
Kristin
Kristin on Ketamine 